Ordering Dessert at a Business Lunch Depends on Your Guest

Posted on 20. Feb, 2009 by Craig Peters in Uncategorized

Should you order dessert at a business lunch? In general, sure, if the conditions are right, go right ahead. Sound’s simple enough–and it actually is simple–but what are the conditions?

Guideline: it’s about your guest, not about you

General guidelines and frameworks are going to serve you better than precise checklists and absolutes. For this dessert question, start by reminding yourself what a business lunch is for in the first place: it’s a business meeting where you connect with your guest. It’s not about the food - it’s about your guest. Like I said in a post last month, Social Capital is all about making your guest feel cared for.

So, your question of dessert has to be viewed through the lens of how it will add to or subtract from your guest’s experience. Let’s say your guest is in a hurry, looking at her watch, and talking about how many meetings she has back at the office. If you then delay her by ordering dessert, well… you’re gonna be bummed.

If, on the other hand, your guest is saying how glad she is that she can take long lunches and heartily asks the waiter to bring the dessert menu… you get the idea. And, like like Zayda Rivera says here, you’re lucky to have the extra time.

If you’re lucky, your guest will order coffee or dessert, which will give you an additional 15 minutes to continue with your business discussions…

But, remember, it comes down to your guest.

Decide for yourself

As you come across business etiquette suggestions and tips about business lunches, take a look; most of them will be related to this general guideline of making your guest feel cared for. Let’s see a couple examples. This eHow article suggests that you shouldn’t make people wait and you should follow the lead of others:

If others order dessert, you can assume this is acceptable, but don’t be the only one having a sweet treat while everyone else is waiting.

Would our general guideline have gotten us here? Yes, because making your guest wait while you eat would not send a message that you’re taking care of their needs, now would it?

Here’s another one, along the same lines. Nell Farragamo says in her post earlier today, “…if you decide not to order dessert and someone at the table does, sip on a coffee or tea.” Your guest doesn’t want to feel like they’re being ‘watched’ as they eat. You don’t want them to feel like a pig. Remember, in this example, you’re not ordering tea or coffee for you - you’re doing it for your guest.

Good luck and happy lunching.